THE OPRAH WINFREY’S FLYING CIRCUS HEAD-IN-HANDS LEAGUE
So named because, out of Pythonesque lunacy, Herr Barney has insisted on including last week’s midweeks games. More truthfully, this was due to the birthdays of Terry Jones (72) and celebrity crash-dieter Oprah Winfrey (60).
Doncaster Rovers v Middlesbrough: 3/23 shots on target Hartlepool United v Scunthorpe United : only 5/17 on target Norwich City v Newcastle United: only 5/30 shots on target
Unsurprisingly, all three games finished goalless.
Those games may have seemed pretty dire, but spare a thought for the 337 spectators at the Queen’s Park – East Stirlingshire game:
East Stirling: 3 Shots but none on target Queen’s Park: 7 Shots but none on target
Michael Smith (Swindon Town) – FAILED!
Adam Le Fondre (Reading) – SCORED!
Patrick Bamford (Derby County) – FAILED!
Fabian Delph (Aston Villa). Fortunately, the shame of the own goal was forgotten when Delph scored at the right end to win the game 4-3 at local rivals West Bromwich Albion.
“Big chance ‘Emerton’ (Everton) had just then.”
Carlisle United 3-0 Milton Keynes Dons. 216 miles in a straight line.
Oldham Athletic v Wolverhampton Wanderers and Leyton Orient v Coventry City. Maybe the telecoms were under water…?
None predicted. Maybe they are too stealthy…?
A debut to forget for Emmanuel Frimpong, obviously sulking about leaving London to have to go to Barnsley (seems reasonable). Was booked on 24 mins, and a second six minutes later.
Most sendings off in a game: Sheffield Wednesday v Barnsley (see above) – ended up as 10 vs 9.
And a notable home mullah-ing in the Conference (North) for Boston United (6-0) against Gainsborough Trinity.
Chris Brunt (West Bromwich Albion), Chris O’Grady (Barnsley), David McGoldrick (Ipswich Town)x2, Kenwyne Jones (Cardiff City), Ryan Lowe (Tranmere Rovers)
NONE! It’s all a conspiracy…
David Mooney (Leyton Orient) , Jonjo Shelvey (Swansea City) , Michael Smith (Swindon Town)
Rhys Murphy (Dagenham & Redbridge), Robin van Persie(Manchester United) x2
Chris Robertson (Port Vale), Kevan Hurst (Southend United), Kevin McDonald (Wolverhampton Wanderers) x2, Sam Vokes (Burnley)x2, Brian Howard (Birmingham City)
OVERALL RESULT: A NARROW WIN FOR LUFFY DESPITE STIFF COMPETITION FROM CHRIS!
Note: WITHOUT THE MIDWEEK RESULTS, THE RESULTS WOULD HAVE BEEN: Sheff U-2, Arsenal-2, Charlton-0, Posh-0…. Sheff W-3