THE ‘Catching Tales in 9.56 secs, Tasty!’ HEAD-IN-HANDS LEAGUE
So named because of the weekend birthdays of Jamie Cullum (40), Usain Bolt (33) and Kelis (40).
Barney: ‘Brexit is good for Brittain at MK’ [Callum Brittain]
Chris: [Radio silence]
Howard: ‘Perch dismissed for Scunny – was it a fishy decision?’ [James Perch]

Andreas Wiemann rolled up 88 games for Derby County before moving on to Bristol City. The Austrian scored for the Ashton Gate outfit against Derby and his mild celebrations are enough for an “It Don’t Mean Nuthin'”. This was bettered by Lee Angol, as the Leyton Orient striker fully enjoyed his goal against his old team at Mansfield Town.
We were also very taken with AFC Wimbledon’s Nesta Guinness-Walker scoring his first goal for his new club, surely a future winner of “Are You My Fag?”. Having gone through the youth systems of Chelsea and Tottingham Hotspurs, he was – I believe this is the correct phrase – picked up by The Metropolitan Police (errr…the football club, of course.).
An action-packed game at Fratton Park, where Portsmouth ran up a 3-1 lead against nine man Coventry City, (who had Gerverse Kasteneer sent off for a second bookable on 78 minutes, 11 minutes after coming on, that’s an absolute “Make Ya Ma Proud”) and collapsed to draw 3-3. “Fresh Hell” a certainty, even for an even-keeled type like Pompey boss Kenny Jackett. Jackett definitely isn’t the only strong contender for the award. Rather less even-keeled, more ‘old-school’ Accrington Stanley boss John Coleman almost certainly took the paint off the home dressing room walls after Stanley lost 2-3 to Shrewsbury Town, who were 2-0 down on 77 minutes.
Honourable mention to Mansfield Town’s rookie boss John Dempster, after his charges going in at halftime 2-0 up and eager for words of wisdom from Dempster, one Halftime Churchill later, the Field Mill subsided to a 2-3 loss. Let’s hope they don’t attempt to ease their disappointment by getting punchy. Oh, wait… [LINK]


Aiden McGeady (Sunderland)
Danny Mayor (Plymouth Argyle)
Luke Varney (Cheltenham Town)
Rory McArdle (Scunthorpe United) x2
Tom Soares (Stevenage) o.g.
Britt Assombalonga (Middlesbrough)
Jack Marriott (Derby County)
Jonson Clarke-Harris (Bristol Rovers)
Lee Angol (Leyton Orient)
Matty Godden (Coventry City)
Frank Nouble (Colchester United)
Luke Varney (Cheltenham Town)
Sullay Kaikai (Blackpool)
Tom Soares (Stevenage) o.g.
James Hanson (Grimsby Town)
Lyle Taylor (Charlton Athletic)