Season 8 Game 01 (11-14 September)

THE ‘Theon Greyjoy is the voice of this town’ HEAD-IN-HANDS LEAGUE
So named because of the weekend birthdays of Alfie Allen (34), Jennifer Hudson (39) and Niall Horan (27) .


Barney: ‘Hugh’ scored for Lincoln – was it Scully?'[Anthony Scully].
Chris: ‘Shrewsbury’s Pierre wasn’t lucky – he was sent off’ [Aaron Pierre]
Howard: ‘Ironside wheels away after scoring for Cambridge’ [Joe Ironside]

Dominic Calvert-Lewin (Everton) scored but, Beryly Lubala (Blackpool) and Jamille Matt (Forest Green Rovers) – so not clean sweep for the Hand. but almost. You’d think It would have enough on these days without ruining the chances of three random footballers.

Nothing to see here. Move along please.

…Alfie May (Hythe Town – Doncaster Rovers – Cheltenham Town)
Cheltenham’s Alfie May clearly likes  Racecourses, having joined the Cotswolds outfit from Doncaster Rovers. His previous club was the mighty Hythe, so he’s come from east to west (changing at Doncaster).

A blank on its’ Season 8 debut. Good start.

And another blank!

Ross County v Celtic (0-5)
The last four matches between these two teams finished a combined 1-17. There have been more even Christians v Lions fights.

Barney – called St Mirren v Hibernian at 0-2 on 17 mins. Finished 0-3 – FAILED!
Howard
– called Cambridge United v Carlisle United at 3-0 on 86 min – Finished – FAILED!
Chris
– called Swindon Town v Rochdale at 3-0 on 41 mins. Finished 3-0 – FAILED!


And we had the most cliched named goalscorer in ‘Local Boy’, which wasn’t a category but Morecambe’s Carlos Mendes Gomes didn’t care…


Chris Maguire (Sunderland)
James Tavernier (Rangers)
Lucas Joao (Reading)


Anthony Grant (Swindon Town)
Conor Washington (Charlton Athletic)
Gwion Edwards (Ipswich Town)
Joe Newell (Hibernian)
Matty Godden (Coventry City)

charlton02
[Josh Magennis (Hull City)

Arsenal
A blank!


Conor Washington (Charlton Athletic)
Dominic Calvert-Lewin (Everton)
Joe Ironside (Cambridge United)
John Brayford (Burton Albion)
Lloyd Kerry (Harrogate Town)


A HALF POINT APIECE FOR THE BLADES AND THE POSH!

Season 7 Results

It ended, if this is possible, in an even more low-key manner than how it began. Against all the odds though, the 7th season was finally completed. See the evidence below in this pretty graph:


So: Sheffield United take the “coveted” prize with 13 and a half points, followed by Charlton (12), Peterborough United (10), Sheffield Wednesday (1 and a half) and Arsenal (half a point only!).

The Blades’ representative, Mr Stephen Luff, is currently not available for comment.

Season 7 Game 36 (6-9 Mar)

THE ‘LAST HEAD-IN-HANDS’ LEAGUE OF THE SEASON.

So named because of the weekend birthdays of …er, again, no-one. But since the previous week worked so well (ha), this weekend saw the birth (in 1925) of Richard Vernon, who, amongst many other roles, played Slartibartfast on The Hitch-hiker’s Guide To The Galaxy (he died in 1997) .


Howard: [the usual punishment applies] – “Blair Henderson’s scored. He must have relished that”


Ian Henderson, once on loan at Rotherham United scored twice against The Millers, which would make a Make Ya Ma Proud. His Rochdale side turned out 3-1 winners.

Will Randall-Hurran (Sutton United) was the poshest name we’d had in a while. Surely a “Are You My Fag?”.

I called Brentford v Sheffield Wednesday at 3-0 as a Stealth Gub. It finished 5-0 to The Bees, so “yay!”. And “Monk out!”


A blank!

Conor Washington (Heart of Midlothian)
Leonardo da Silva Lopes (Hull City)
Matt Stevens (Forest Green Rovers)
Matty Godden (Coventry City)

charlton02Tarique Fosu (Brentford)

Arsenal
Josh Dasilva (Brentford) x2
Luke Ayling (Leeds United)
Olivier Giroud (Chelsea)

Chris Porter (Crewe Alexandra)
Conor Washington (Heart of Midlothian)
Scott Hogan (Birmingham City on loan from Aston Villa)
Sean McGinty (Greenock Morton)


IT’S FINALLY OVER! AND A SHARED WIN FOR THE POSH, THE BLADES AND ER… THE ARSENAL. CURSES.

Season 7 Game 35 (28 Feb – 2 Mar)

THE ‘Even BaRney coUldn’t thInk of a title for this one’ HEAD-IN-HANDS LEAGUE

So named because of the weekend birthdays of no-one, althogh just for something to add in, we will make note of the anniversary of the birth, in 1925 of Harry H. Corbett (had he not sadly died in 1982, he’d’ve been 85)


Howard: “[Joe] Pigott scored – but it wasn’t against Leicester” {it was for AFC Wimbledon against Gillingham}

[Barney chose Jamie Murphy at Burton Albion (no), Anton Dowds at East Fife (no) and Aleksandar Mitrovic at Fulham (no). A clean sweep for the Thing.


This is a very truncated edition and should have had the following categories: Cup Week, Diamond Lights, Not A Kid, Shirley and Pagga!


Michail Antonio (West Ham United)

Christian Burgess (Portsmouth)
Kieran Sadlier (Doncaster Rovers)
Matty Godden (Coventry City)

charlton02Joe Pigott (AFC Wimbledon)
Karlan Grant (Huddersfield Town) x2 – counting double against his old club
Regan Charles-Cook (Gillingham)

ArsenalLuke Ayling (Leeds United)


Chris Hussey (Cheltenham Town)
Dominic Calvert-Lewin (Everton)
John Brayford (Burton Albion)
Sam Vokes (Stoke City)
Scott Hogan (Birmingham City on loan from Aston Villa) x2


A JOINT WIN FOR CHARLTON AND THE BLADES (BUT NOT THE WHEELIES)