Season 3 Game 08 (11-13 September)

THE ‘Bilbo’s Yellow Untouchables’ HEAD-IN-HANDS LEAGUE

So named because of the weekend birthdays of Sir Ian Holm (84), Coldplay guitarist Jonny Buckland (38) and Director Brian De Palma (75).


Nothing rosy in the {Michael} Gardyne for Motherwell
Howard: Michael Rankine is Uptown Top…
Chris:Preston makes Dunfermline Ordinary Boys. (Barney judged this one the winner, though at the risk of seeming ungracious, I believe it was used last season. Points for recycling though. It’s good for the planet and all that. My vote for the top Zinger is probably the Gardyne one.)

He Shi*s GoalsHe Sh*ts Goals
Omar Bogle (Grimsby Town) – SCORED TWICE!! – He will learn to defy the dread hand of Barney…
Osman Sow (Heart of Midlothian) – FAILED!
Jay O’Shea (Chesterfield) – FAILED!

DON'T CALL ME SHIRLEYDon’t Call Me Shirley
Blank. This week’s crop of players being far too er…manly (?)

Make Ya Ma ProudMake Ya Ma Proud
Velon Behrami’s mother wipes away a prideful tear as her son gets a red on his Watford debut.

It Dont Mean NuthinIt Don’t Mean Nuthin’
No acts of satisfying revenge were carried out this week. Must try harder.

Born into BurberryBorn In Burberry
Forest Green’s Keanu Marsh-Brown has been down this here road before (to quite Whitesnake), so the trophy goes to Kilmarnock’s Kallum Higginbotham, who will be collecting the accolade in his Nissan Micra with a spoiler on the back and tinted windows. That’s Callum….with a K. Innit.

Stealth GubStealth Gub
– called Gillingham v Blackpool at 1-0 on 15 min – Finished 2-1!- FAILED!
– called Birmingham City v Bristol City at 3-1 on 48 min – Finished 4-2 – FAILED!
– called St Johnstone v Hamilton Academical at 3-0 on 43 min – Finished 4-1 – FAILED!

Youre not a kid anymoreYou’re Not A Kid Anymore
Charlie Walker at Aldershot, come on down and take your Chopper with you (oo-er missus)!


The big news this week was the always-welcome return of A Trialist, scoring for Annan Athletic. Despite his return, Annan went down 4-2.

The Results

SevenBenik Afobe (Wolverhampton Wanderers)
Daniel Jones (Chesterfield)
Eddie Nolan (York City)
Leon Clarke (Bury)
Steven MacLean (St Johnstone) x3

EightCharlie Lee (Stevenage)
Chris Whelpdale (Stevenage)
Izale McLeod (Notts County) x2
Lewin Nyatanga (Barnsley) x2 {1 as an own goal}
Nathaniel Knight-Percival (Shrewsbury Town)
Reuben Reid (Plymouth Argyle)

FourIzale McLeod (Notts County)x2
Leon Clarke (Bury)
Martyn Waghorn (Rangers)

FourBenik Afobe (Wolverhampton Wanderers)
Henri Lansbury (Nottingham Forest)
Jay Simpson (Leyton Orient)
Rhys Murphy (Oldham Athletic)

FiveIzale McLeod (Notts County)x2
Nick Blackman (Reading)
Nicky Law (Rangers)
Ritchie de Laet (Leicester City)