Season 9 Game 06 (17-20 September)

THE ‘Common People in the Madagascar Jungle’ HEAD-IN-HANDS LEAGUE

Birthdays on this skivey week were for Jarvis Cocker (58), Jada Pinkett Smith (50) and Goldie (56).

So named due to the weekend birthdays of………

Howard Usually this will have a punishment in a hastily-written zinger, but even I can’t be bothered this week as we’re so far behind and travel wi-fi is still poor.

Barney – called Accrington Stanley v Wigan Athletic at 0-2 on 22 min – Finished: 1-4 – FAILED!

No others were recorded (a likely story).

This should’ve been a full edition, but anything to do with it has vanished from the Barney Archive. This is what we know of:

The title was almost “Cocker, David Seaman and Joanne Catherall – Common People ‘shed’ One Man…”.

Categories were to be: Make Ya Ma Proud, It Don’t Mean Nuthin’, Unpleasant Local Derby, Darwinism Incarnate and Category Without A Name.

Arbroath’s Michael McKenna, Morecambe’s Cole Stockton and Ben Brereton-Diaz at Blackburn Rovers may become fresh meat for the Eternal One.

No candidates for the Dread Hand of Barney were identified – obviously they were given a temporary reprieve from eternal damnation.

Aiden McGeady (Sunderland)
Lee Nicholls (Huddersfield Town) o.g.
Stevie May (St Johnstone)
Vadaine Oliver (Gillingham)
Will Keane (Wigan Athletic)

Adam King (Alloa Athletic)
Ivan Toney (Brentford)
Jack Payne (Crawley Town)
Josh McQuoid (Weymouth)
Matt Stevens (Forest Green Rovers)
Michael Bostwick (Burton Albion) o.g.
Saido Berahino (Sheffield Wednesday)
Tommy Rowe (Doncaster Rovers)

Aiden McGeady (Sunderland)
Andrew Shinnie (Livingston)
Josh Umerah (Wealdstone)
Macauley Bonne (Ipswich Town on loan from Queens Park Rangers)

Danny Welbeck (Brighton and Hove Albion)

Ben Whiteman (Preston North End)
James Wilson (Port Vale)
Joe Ironside (Cambridge United)
Matt Phillips (West Bromwich Albion)