THE Sir Viv hits 50 Shades of Shaq HEAD-IN-HANDS LEAGUE
So named because of the weekend birthdays of Sir Vivian Richards (64) 50 Shades of Grey director Sam Taylor-Wood (49) and NBA Legend Shaquille O’Neal (44, if you can have a legend in Basketball…).
Barney: ‘Falkirk’s ‘Mark Kerr’ evaded his ‘Marker’ for the goal’ (Makes more sense when you say it, but not THAT much more sense. [But then he used up all his puns in the category below)
Chris: Self-inflicted alcohol wound
Howard: ‘Everybody’s Talkin’ about Nilsson’s goal for Stevenage’
The Dread Hand of Barney
It’s my sad duty to report Accrington’s Billy Kee snapped in the lock, Lyle Taylor wasn’t Swift for AFC Wimbledon and Doncaster’s Andy Williams Took His Eyes Off You. (Barney’s Zinger quotient has reached ‘Danger’ levels)
Barney – called Millwall v Blackpool at 2-0 on 24 min – Finished – 4-0 – FAILED!
Howard – called Walsall v Brnsley at 1-3 on 61 min – Finished – 1-3 – FAILED!
Chris – called Manchester City v Aston Villa at 2-0 on 48 min – Finished – 4-0 – FAILED!
Which is bought to you this week by Chigwell Construction, the new sponsors of Dagenham & Redbridge’s stadium – a whole lot snappier than The London Borough of Barking & Dagenham Stadium, their previous sponsor.
Only one story this week, Remi Garde’s halftime instructions to his players after 45 mins at the Etihad were meant to keep their wheels turning, keeping the score at 0-0. Alas, the pep talk led to the their bowels churning, as they shipped (shipped, I said) 2 within 5 minutes on their way to a 4-0 good seeing-to. Halftime Churchill du jour, as Garde probably has never said.